How to Make Friends in College

How to Make Friends in College Lets be honest: making friends in college can be scary. If youre heading to college for the first time, chances are you only know a few people, if that. If youre at a school where you feel like you dont have any friends, it might seem like its too late to focus on making new ones. Fortunately, your time in college is like no other. It is forgiving and built for you to learn and explore, especially when it comes to making friends. Challenge Yourself Making friends in college is a challenge. Know that making friends at school is going to require a little effort on your part. While friendships can blossom naturally, it takes some energy to go out and meet your soon-to-be-friends for the first time. So challenge yourself to step outside of your comfort zone. Do some of the social activities during orientation week sound lame? Yup. But should you go to them anyway? Most definitely. After all, do you want to experience a little awkwardness (the event) for long-term benefits (meeting people), or do you want to experience a little comfort (staying in your room) in exchange for long-term disadvantages (meeting people who might turn into friends)? A little effort now can pay off quite a bit later when it comes to making friends in college. So challenge yourself to try something new, even if it sounds unusual for you or a bit scary at first. Know That Everyone in College is New If youre a first-year student, nearly everyone in your class is brand new. Which means that everyone is trying to meet people and make friends. Consequently, theres no reason to feel awkward or shy about chatting up strangers, joining a group in the quad, or outreaching to as many people as possible. It helps everyone! Additionally, even if youre in your third year in college, there are still new experiences for you. That statistics class you have to take for grad  school? Everyone in it is new to you, and vice versa. The people in your residence hall, apartment building, and the club are all-new, too. So reach out and talk to folks whenever you find yourself in a new situation; you never know where your new best friend is hiding. Know That Its Never Too Late to Start Over in College   One of the best things about college is that its designed to help you grow. Just because you were focused on figuring out what you wanted to major in during your first two years doesnt mean that you cant, for example, join a fraternity or sorority your junior year. If you didnt realize your love of reading and writing poetry until you took that rockin course last semester, know that its not too late to join the poetry club. People come in and out of social spheres and cliques all the time in college; its part of what makes college great. Seize those kinds of opportunities to meet new people whenever and wherever you can. Keep Trying Alright, so this year you wanted to make more friends. You joined a club or two, looked at joining a sorority/fraternity, but its now two months later and nothings clicking. Dont give up! Just because the things you tried didnt work out doesnt mean the next thing you try wont work, either. If nothing else, you figured out what you dont like at your school or in certain groups of people. All that means is that you owe it to yourself to keep trying. Get Out of Your Room If you feel like you dont have any friends, it can be tempting to just go to class, maybe go to work, and then head home. But being alone in your room is the worst possible way to make friends. You have 0% chance of interacting with new people. Challenge yourself a little bit to be around other people. Do your work in the campus coffee shop, library, or even out on the quad. Hang out in the student center. Write your paper in the computer lab instead of your room. Ask some students in your classes if they want to make a study group together. You dont have to be best friends right away, but you will end up helping each other with your homework while also getting some time to get to know each other. There are tons of ways to put yourself in situations where meeting people and making friends can happen organically- but being in your room all the time isnt one of them. Get Involved in Something You Care About Instead of making friends being your motivating factor, let your heart lead the way. Find a campus organization or club, or even one in your neighboring community, and see how you can get involved. Chances are, along with the good work youll be doing, youll find some people with similar values as you. And chances are at least one or two of those connections will turn into a friendship. Be Patient With Yourself Think back to when you were in high school and the friendships youve maintained from there. Your friendships probably changed and morphed from your first day of high school to your last. College is no different. Friendships come and go, people grow and change, and everyone adjusts along the way. If its taking you a little time to make friends in college, be patient with yourself. It doesnt mean you cant make friends; it just means you havent yet. The only way you will end up definitely not making friends in college is to stop trying. So as frustrating  as it may feel and as discouraged as you may be, be patient with yourself and keep trying. Your new friends are out there!